I was a bit surprised at the words I was hearing. Someone was choosing to take offense. Yes, choosing. No offense was given, nor intended. But offense was still taken.
It is amazing how we live in the story in our heads. This story was that in a crisis someone didn’t think they were supported. So now the question is would they in turn be supportive? Or would they live out the story in their head? But here’s the ridiculous part. They were supported. The very people they were angry at (because they found themselves in a pinch by their own choices) had tried to help them and actually lost a large amount of money SUPPORTING them. How was that truth lost?
Maybe they didn’t know? They did know. Many doors were opened for them during a time when they needed great support. But that act of support was long washed away in the anger so that in the next crisis they believed support was nowhere to be found. So, they took offense. And anger fired toward those they thought should be there for them. And the truth, that they were cared for and supported was long gone.
Maybe when we are angry we need to slow down and search for more data? Maybe we are living in the story in our head, justifying and overlooking, or forgetting other truth that would shape the story differently?
I am going to work on this. I’m committing to work on when I take offense to declare to myself I am taking offense and I must begin to search my heart and history (the story) for other possible data, other possible understandings. I don’t want to take offense. How about you?